Cassidy: Google, Dropbox, iCloud -- Silicon Valley has created my own personal cloud of confusion

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Illustration by Chuck Todd

Face it: The cloud is not all it's cracked up to be.

Yes, I'm living in the cloud now, and who isn't in this era when every time you turn around you're hearing about "cloud computing"? And you know what my cloud looks like? It looks like my home office: Papers scattered everywhere. Vital bits of my life safely tucked away in folders put away in drawers -- only which folders in what drawers? The family passports. Are they in the folder marked "Vacation"? Of course not. They're in the "Kids' birth certificates" folder because, well, because they're both government documents, right?

With the cloud, the geniuses of the Internet and data storage have created a world where there are an infinite number of digital folders and drawers and virtual home offices, and I am helpless before them. There are all sorts of clouds swirling above me -- Google (GOOG) Docs, Dropbox, my company's trusty servers. Column notes, recipes, old news stories, angry letters from readers -- they're all in there. Somewhere.

My photos are in the cloud, too. Shutterfly, Facebook, Instagram, Twitter. But which photos are where? They live on and on (I hope) in massive server farms in Oregon and North

Carolina. Not to mention my videos on YouTube. What I've learned is that when papers, photos and videos are everywhere, sometimes you can't find them anywhere.

And now another cloud is moving in -- iCloud, which saved me when my apps and iBooks mysteriously disappeared from my iPod touch. The iPod touch, of course, means you can access any of your digital possessions from almost anywhere -- the beauty of the cloud. But the truth is, that doesn't do me a lot of good when I don't even know which cloud I've seeded with what document.

Let's see. Where did I put that list of guys who attended my bachelor party in 1992? Hmm. Of course, it's in the "My Tidbits" folder. You know, right there with House Speaker John Boehner's 2008 "mud sandwich" speech supporting TARP (the Troubled Asset Relief Program). Do I have any idea why I saved that? No. Would I have saved it if I didn't have the cloud? No way.

You say you don't even know what the cloud is?

Turns out only 22 percent of U.S. consumers do know -- at least according to an August 2011 study by the NPD Group. I've got that in my "Stuff" folder on Google Docs. (Generally, cloud computing is using the Internet and any number of devices to perform tasks and access applications that historically have been done and accessed on our desktop computers.) But here's the thing: Even though three-quarters of the population hasn't the foggiest about the cloud, 76 percent of those polled actually use it. (Cloud popularity fun fact: Three days worth of video are uploaded to YouTube every minute.)

The reason for the cloud of confusion? There really isn't one technical definition of "the cloud." It's as much a term of art as science that has come to describe all manner of Internet services, including some that were around before the phrase became popular. Just last week Larry Ellison caused a stir when he tried to clarify his frequently stated frustration with the imprecision of the word. (Wait. Larry Ellison? A stir? Get out!)

"I like the word," he said while on stage at the D: All Things Digital conference. "I objected to some people saying it was new. I like it because it's a charismatic brand for the next generation of computing."

We've moved away from simply having a complicated PC connected to a complicated network, Ellison explained. Now we're mobile with mobile devices in hand. I can access the guest list for my bachelor party while on the go. Well, provided I have that iPod touch with me. The other day, I left the thing at work. Within hours of arriving home that night I was in the cold sweat of withdrawal. It was as if my cloud had just drifted away.

And why wouldn't I get the shakes?

My banking is in the cloud. My household budget. My medical history. My contacts. Images of my kids' soccer games. When you get down to it, my entire life is in the cloud.

And it's no doubt just a matter of time before I misplace the whole thing.

Contact Mike Cassidy at mcassidy@mercurynews.com or 408-920-5536. Follow him at Twitter.com/mikecassidy.

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